INCOMING! KILLER SPAM SCAM PORN FLOOD APPROACHING!

Hold on tight, folks, because a massive tidal wave of spam is about to crash down on your email. We're talking horrendous amounts of scammy emails packed with sick porn. These bastards are trying to cheat you out of your hard-earned money, so be extremely careful. Don't click on any links in these emails, and report them immediately. Don't get c